A Popular False Teaching About the Second Greatest Command

The second greatest commandment is to “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:37-40). 

Sadly, there's a very popular false teaching about this commandment expressed below:

“The fruit of our relationships hinges on our ability to love ourselves with the love that God has for us. We must have positive feelings about ourselves before we can offer genuine love to others.” (source)

Is it true? Must we love ourselves before we can love others?

Nothing in Scripture tells us to love ourselves, least of all this verse. If lack of self-love was a human problem, Scripture would address it. Instead, Scripture emphasizes self-denial and humility and mentions self-love as a serious sin (2 Timothy 3:1-5). 

This doesn’t mean we hate ourselves. It means we have a humble, realistic view of ourselves (Romans 12:3).

In addition, when we’re commanded to love others, it means we treat them humanely as we’d want to be treated. It doesn't mean we admire them or even like them. That’s why we can even love our enemies (Matthew 5:44). 

Matthew 22:39 commands us to focus on others, a common theme of Scripture (Philippians 2:3-4). This false teaching tells us to focus on ourselves, a common theme of false teachings. 

-----------------------

This false teaching is part of "Christianized" self-esteem teachings. Read more about a biblical attitude toward ourselves in these devotions:

6 Ways the Self-Esteem Movement Contradicts Scripture 

This 1-minute devotion packs a powerful punch, exposing six ways the self-esteem movement contradicts Scripture.

Are You Ready to Join the Resistance? 

We need to admit it if we've bought into the non-biblical self-esteem philosophy. This short devotion looks at Galatians 6. 

A Trophy for Everyone?  

In our self-esteem, no-fault culture, every child gets a trophy. But don't mistake the ways of culture for the ways of God. This 1-minute devotion explains. 

What the Old Testament Teaches About Self-Esteem  The Old Testament is in full agreement with the New Testament regarding the dangers of high self-esteem and gives us some vivid examples. 

For a thorough look at the errors of self-esteem philosophy, see:

Biblical Self-Esteem, a collection of more than forty devotions on the subject. You can use them for small group study or to reeducate yourself with the biblical view of a healthy self-esteem.

Bible Love Notes