Christians stress godly parenting.
But when was the last time you heard an adult lesson on honoring parents?(1)
God included it in His 10 Commandments, and He lists disrespect for parents in several lists of wicked attitudes (2 Timothy 3:1-5; Romans 1:28-32).
Yet many Christians prefer the world's "fifth commandment" which goes something like this: "Parents, honor your adult children. Have no expectations. Give them what they ask. Keep your advice to yourself. Then it might go well with you."
There's an alarming trend in our world of adult children neglecting, rejecting, blaming, and estranging parents, even using grandchildren as pawns to punish or manipulate their parents.
Jesus says we can't honor Him if we're dishonoring our parents (See Matthew 15:3-9).
The two are related.
If we're treating our parents with less respect than our friends, we aren't listening to Scripture.
When we honor our parents, we honor God. When we dishonor our parents, we dishonor God (Ephesians 6:2; Exodus 20).
(1) Often Mother's and Father's Day sermons stress a mother's and father's responsibilities more than on our need to honor mothers and fathers.
Bible Love Notes has an archive of 1-minute devotions on Honoring Parents.
I encourage you to take a few extra minutes to do the Bite Size Bible Study for this devotion.
Note:
This devotion does not address children who have been physically or
sexually abused by parents. They must seek godly Christian counsel in
handling their relationship with their parents.
How do you honor your parents if they don't want you around?
ReplyDeleteDear Unknown, I'm sorry that your parents don't want you around. That must be very hard.
DeleteI encourage you to ask God how you can honor them in other ways. Perhaps as you continue to forgive them and honor them, they will change. Whether they do or not, you will be rewarded by the Lord. It's a promise that's attached to this command.
I take care of my Mom, she has been sick for a while now, and it has humbled me tremendously. I have always loved her and I am so happy God has made a way for me to be there for her. I always remember in my heart, of all the timesame she has been there for me, she is my Angel on earth here with me.
DeleteI struggled with this until I realized that when I did not respond to mean comments and untruths, I was in fact honoring my parent. You can't make anyone love you. Rely on God's love and understanding. It provides wonderful peace.
ReplyDeleteI think there's wisdom in what you are saying. Yes, we can't change people nor can we make them love us or treat us right, but we can still honor them. May God continue to give you wisdom and perseverance.
Deletethis is a huge struggle with me. I am fine with my parents, but with my in-laws, I struggle. They divorced 3 years before my husband and I met. Both remarried soon after the divorce. Both have done nothing but lied to us and attacked us. One lied to creditors and took money out in our name. It caused us to be in serious financial trouble, we could have filed charges, but accepted the actions, and worked hard to pay the debt, only to have this person try the exact same thing 20 years later, but a identity theft alert stopped the loan. The other one, has thrown temper tantrums( yelling, throwing stuff, spilling drinks on strangers) in public places (like my children's school activities), even throwing a BBQ sandwich on me at a family function. Please note, I was not even engaged with this person, at the time of the incident. I was the target simply because our opinions differed about a topic, that I was discussing with a mutual acquaintance. Since the latest temper tantrum, I have avoided both of my in-laws. My husband has avoided them since we got married, but it has always been important for me, that my children know their entire family. My children range in age from 13-24. They want nothing to do with these grandparents, but adore the step grandparents, as do my husband and I. I have prayed about this and asked for advice from church leaders, friends, even family members. I don't know how to resolve the commandment of honoring our parents, and protecting myself and family from attacks.
ReplyDeleteDear Bamber,
DeleteI'm so sorry that you have had to suffer these problems.
I would not attempt to counsel you beyond encouraging you to pray and seek God until you have a peace about how you handle your in-laws. God knows every detail, and He can give you wisdom.
God bless you.
Gail