We live in a world that cherishes self-esteem but has little use for constructive criticism or rebuke, no matter how genuine or legitimate.
It's hard to be wise in such a world because wisdom requires humility and teachability, plus honest assessment of our strengths and weaknesses.
“Do not rebuke mockers or they will hate you; rebuke the wise and they will love you. Instruct the wise and they will be wiser still…” Proverbs 9:8-9
We usually seek out people who'll tell us what we want to hear instead of what we need to hear. We'd rather feel good about ourselves than be good!
Being teachable and humble doesn't come naturally. And in our present culture, it's a struggle to be God-esteemers instead of self-esteemers.
But godly wisdom is worth the effort, so let's pray for the right attitude toward correction and expect God to give us some opportunities to practice!
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It's especially important to reject some of the self-esteem teachings related to parenting because they inspire narcissism instead of godliness. See Biblical Nurture Doesn't Promote High Self-Esteem.
For more encouragement to accept correction, see The Sting of Correction and Accepting Correction – 10 Scriptures.
BLN
There is so much wisdom in this post. Too often on social media, I see popular memes that are intended to be Christian content, but they are self-serving and soaked in promotion of self above others; therefore lifting their own self-esteem. They are not at all inline with Scripture. We need to be careful to watch out for content or verbal advice from others that promote feeling good over being good as you so well explain in your post.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Tina. I totally agree that so often the focus in esteeming ourselves instead of esteeming God.
DeleteI'm a little confused about the idea of not talking to people who mock us. Shouldn't we be trying to bring as many people as possible to Jesus? I read the verses in Proverbs 9 and understand it is scripture, but it's kind of sad that so many people will suffer eternally.
ReplyDeleteDear Donna,
DeleteI appreciate your question and your heart for the lost. This is one aspect of our interaction with people, not the only aspect. I think your confusion is over the definition of a mocker. A mocker is not simply someone who does the wrong things or believes the wrong things. It's someone who intentionally enjoys making fun of another person's beliefs. They aren't open to correction.
For example, there are people called Trolls who find joy in writing mean comments. I have a couple of atheists who do this on my posts on social media. At first I tried to graciously explain things or correct them, but I soon found that they were not interested in a discussion or even a debate. Their whole purpose was to say rude things, call me names, and make fun of Christianity.
Then I read a bit about these kind of people and found out that they thrive on being rude to people so responding to them caused them to pick on you all the more.
And there are troller-type people in life as well as on social media. Their purpose is to mock us, and they aren't open to listen.
This is addressed in other passages of Scripture as well. For example:
"Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. 24 And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. 25 Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, 26 and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will." 2Timothy 2:23-26.
Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. 11 You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned. Titus 3:10-11
It's appropriate to share the gospel with people, but we easily learn that some people aren't interested in listening. We can pray that they change their hearts but arguing with them is a waste of time.
You might also want to check out: When to Defend the Faith and When to Be Quiet