Such a Pity, Not a Party

Such a Pity, Not a Party

Self pity: "excessive, self-absorbed unhappiness over one's own troubles."

Sometimes I allow it to take charge of my head and heart.

Not a good thing. Not a God thing.

It's not that I don't have reasons to be disappointed and even discouraged.

Paul said he was once so discouraged he felt he couldn't go on (2 Corinthians 1:8-10).

That's when he turned it all over to the Lord. 

And went on.

And that's what we must do with self-pity.

Self-pity is self-focused, self-indulgent, self-pandering, self-destructive.

It's sin.

God calls us to:
May the Lord help us do these things whenever self-pity enters our hearts. We are able through His mighty power, to accomplish infinitely more than we ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20).

Such a Pity, Not a Party


  1. God bless you. I love your devotionals

  2. Good morning!
    For something like the past year now I've subscribed to your devotionals, and they've been a blessing to me. Thank you for taking the time to perform this ministry to so many other Christians. I did have a note about this one though. You say that self-pity is excessive unhappiness over one's one troubles, and that self-pity is a sin, plain and simple. That may be, but, as someone struggling with major depressive disorder, I often find myself so completely unhappy with not just my circumstances, but who I am as a person, that I feel physically incapable of thinking about anything else. A good portion of my problem stems from knowing that I can't fulfill all of God's requirements and the idea that I'm constantly trying so hard and still doing worse as a Christian than any decent person would just be able to do. Is being so overwhelmed with self-hatred that I find myself physically unable to perform daily tasks, a sin? Is that another sin I'm committing that I feel myself unable to quell? Is there ever an escape from constantly failing in things I ought to be able to do easily, this side of Heaven?

    1. Hi friend,
      I'm sure you know I'm not a trained counselor. I write about things in my life that I'm dealing with or have dealt with, and I try to pass along the things I've learned.

      Perhaps what I've written doesn't apply to your situation, or maybe some of it does and some doesn't.

      I know God doesn't want you disabled with self-hatred. Scripture says He wants us to have a fair idea of ourselves, admitting our sins but recognizing our strengths (Romans 12:3).

      From my personal experiences with self-pity, discouragement, and depression (yes, I went through a 6 month period where I was depressed 24/7), the most important things I needed to do were

      1. Take my thoughts captive (2 Cor. 10:5)
      2. focus on the needs of others, not my own (Philippians 2:3-6).

      Again, this may not be what helps you, but I throw it out there in case it is.
      I'll also include some other devotions (linked below) that speak about some of the things I've mentioned.

      And I want you to know that I have said a prayer for you today and I've asked God to bring you to mind throughout the coming weeks.

      I am praying that God gives you His strength and confidence to do all that He has prepared for you to do, one day at a time (Ephesians 2:10).
      In Christ's love, Gail

      Same Old Lie:

      Balcony Views:

      Even Paul Despaired:

      Eat, Rest, Cry:

      Walk Away:

      Tell Yourself the Truth:

      He Lifts My Head:

      The Power of Negative Self-Talk:

    2. Sisters in Christ, I have a love hate relationship with technology but oh how I love this side of it where we can connect, fellowship and lift each other up over the screen. I have not only struggled with depression, but I also have a mother who is a manic depressant. So, my words only come from life experience not bc I'm a trained therapist by any means. You can take what I say with a grain of salt, or perhaps my words can be salt to your circumstance. @rierierose: one thing you said that made me sad is you felt you couldn't fulfill God requirements of you. That is not scriptural and not of The Lord. He does NOT expect us to live perfectly and the check boxes filled. The 10 commandments weren't given to us because He knew we woulf be able to keep them, rather a guide to live by. He wants us to completely give our hearts and lives to Him and He will help us. He has given us the Holy Spirt, Our Helper. He also covers us in His Perfect Grace. Washing away our incapabilities and renewing us with His strength. There is no such thing as the perfect Christian. It just doesn't exist. Aren’t we all falling short? It’s God’s Grace that brings us through. NOT our perfection.
      Women have an amazing ability to look at themselves first. It's like the Lord has placed that spiritual gift in us. If something goes wrong, I usually say to myself, "What did I do to cause this?" Men, typically, do not suffer from this! As women, we own it. And it's a beautiful thing, but it can be burdensome when it's not real and when it's self-inflicted.

      Friend, I encourage you to breath the fresh Grace of God and the feeesom that comes with it. He knows we can't do this on our own. If we could, there would have been no need for Christs death. I will pray for you. That the Lord break the stronghold over your heart and mind of depression and that you may feel Gods freeing Grace to live abundantly through Him. Always remember Corinthians 12:9 It’s “Christ’s power in me, not my own strength where I am made strong”. God Bless you friend.

      But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

  3. I think you addressed this well. There is a difference in depression and self-pity, in that depression is often a chemical balance and not a choice, though I truly believe that the Lord can bring us through anything. I also think we need to walk through periods of darkness and gain the wisdom they offer.


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