A Little Politeness Goes a Long Way

A Marriage tip that addresses a "little thing" that can make a big difference. #Marriage #Bible #Politeness
Familiarity breeds contempt.

When you know someone well, you know all of their faults and may find it harder to show them respect. But this shouldn't happen in our marriages.

We are all fallen creatures who struggle with selfishness. And respecting our spouse despite his/her faults requires prayer, humility (awareness of our own faults), and forgiveness. 

Respect involves a number of things--attitudes and actions, big things and little things. 

So let's talk about one of the little things that can add up to a big thing: Politeness.  

Are you polite to your spouse?

Often we're more polite to strangers than those we love most dearly. Yet politeness goes a long way in setting an atmosphere of respect in our home and in our marriage. 

Philippians 2:3 is a good passage to motivate politeness:  "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves..."

Here's some small ways to be polite:
  • Generously use these words: please, thank-you, excuse me, I'm sorry.
  • Ask, don't demand. (i.e. "Would you mind moving your stuff off the table, honey?" versus "Move your stuff off the table.")
  • Look your spouse in the eye when he's talking to show he has your undivided attention
  • Acknowledge things your husband says even when you're busy. 
Ephesians 4:29 is another verse that reminds us that our words should be gracious and kind: "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." 

Politeness is really about "little things" that make a big difference--little ways to show respect

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A Marriage tip that addresses a "little thing" that can make a big difference. #Marriage #Bible #Politeness


  1. You make excellent points, Gail. The fact that we can "turn on" politeness when we encounter others, also shows us that we can be polite to our spouses even when we don't feel like it. Thanks for the reminder today.

  2. It really does matter so much--the little things like politeness--in a marriage relationship, Gail. I notice when my hubby lets these areas slide and I know he notices when I let them slide as well. It's something we're trying to teach our younger son, who, even at 17, is not fully grounded in this very important skill. Thanks for the reminder today, my friend!

  3. Oh, this is a convicting reminder to not let familiarity turn our love foul. It really is the little things that make a big difference in marriage. Thanks for the wise reminder.

  4. Thanks for this reminder:) Pinned!

  5. Thanks so much for linking this great post up to Wedded Wed, Gail. It was one of the favorites I've read over the past few days! I'm still mulling it over in my mind as I choose to be polite to my loved ones. :)

  6. Great post! Thanks for linking up with Marriage Monday! I think Politeness is more important than we realize -- so often we treat complete strangers better than our own husband and children! We should attempt to put our best foot forward even at home! Thanks for the encouragement to show love by simply having good manners!

  7. Wise words, indeed! Thanks for a lovely visit :)

  8. I couldn't agree more! I think one of the reasons my husband and I have such a strong marriage is because we are polite to one another. One thing we have both learned to do is to turn away from the computer/monitor when someone is talking to us, especially one another but also if we are on our cell phones. It can be very hard to listen when you are reading your email and it is just polite to listen and give someone all of your attention!

  9. A very on-the-spot post. It's too true that we often treat our family members (especially our spouses) way worse than we'd ever treat our friends or even strangers. Thanks for the reminder to be polite. :)

  10. Such excellent points,Gail. These are points I had to work hard on after years of raising children.

    That is a wonderful picture of you and Michael. WHAT A YOUNG COUPLE!!

    I also love your new linkup button on the sidebar!!

    Thanks for linking up with me over at WholeHearted Home.

  11. My husband and I started off our friendship with mutual respect for each other. As the years of marriage have gone by and the intense stress that life throws at us, it's hard to watch our tongues and attitudes but so very important! This is something I am trying to pass on to my grand kids. Thanks you for the reminder!